Two Sides

By Sheyla Javier

My inspiration for this piece came after having a deep conversation with someone I trust. I came to the realization that there are two different sides to everyone—including myself.

They say there are two sides to every story
The same goes for yourself
You have the side that everyone
Sees, knows, and perceives
The mask you unconsciously wear
The walls you hide behind
That cause you to
Hold your breath and bite your tongue
You have moments where you
Laugh with tears in your eyes
You’re distracted
Psyched out
Your smile comes off so genuine
Yet you feel like it’s forced
Even if it’s just for a second
You also have the side that only you
See, know, and understand
The side that is
Completely unfiltered, raw, and real
You have
Flaws, insecurities, habits, quirks
You can’t seem to get rid of
But you stand up to them like a
Gust of wind
At full force
In the middle of fall
Yet the bar is set so high
Expectations seem out of reach
The weight
Pressing down on you
This is the side that has you
Wrapped around its finger
Constantly lurking in the back of your mind
One second you seem to be
Soaring way above the clouds
The next
Underwater gasping for air
Your inner voice
Constantly torn between the two sides
Your conscious says it’s okay to be
Double-sided.

Performance