Ventricles

By Ashley Wu

The bottom of a heart is in two. The left ventricle cradles oxygenated blood, but the right ventricle is deoxygenated, craving.

I love you
and from the bottom 
of my heart
I assure you that

I will move on. 
I will not wallow in the sea 
of my sorrows shaded red,
drowning, suffocating in
             nothing
for what am I without you?

And I am full of 
joy for you. 
You were not
happy here, you were not
full here. 
I could not fill you 
with what you deserved because 
the bottom of my heart 
is in two. 

It is from my 
left         that I wish
to tell you goodbye, 
full of life and strength,
assuring you that, beyond you,
I have a purpose, assuring you that
something needs me. 

But it is only
right      that you leave.

Leave me empty, 
devoid of what I once had, 
what I once gave,
what I wish to receive. 

O, I am drowning!
I was supposed 
to be your anchor
supposed
to protect you
supposed 
to save you. 

Instead you
were my lungs
and I, 
greedily,
feasted on your creations,
for the bottom of my heart
is empty. 

You wanted to sail and I
could not let you, for you
were my buoy and I 
was drowning. 
                                         (Am drowning.)
You
have escaped my four chambers.

You
have sailed free from my embrace 
on a wind warm with breath
pushed from 
lungs. 

Process

I never thought biology would make me need to write a poem, but here I am. I wanted to give a deeper meaning to the phrase “from the bottom of my heart,” so I took it literally. Biology taught me that a heart has four chambers. The bottom two, the ventricles, have one blaring difference: one is full of oxygen, one is devoid of it. There had to be some significance there, right? How can we speak sincerely from a place of both death and life? I felt the pull to write a poem with this new meaning.