I Am Your Vision

By Sienna Lipton

A poem about the internalized male gaze that verbalizes the ways it affects my thinking and everyday life.

Beat me
Slam me into the table
Work me with your rough hands, over and over
I am clay to be shaped
Every part to your preference
Mold me until I am exactly what you envisioned
Until I know how to be exactly what you envisioned
I live for you
I play my role for you
When you are satisfied I am fulfilled
And without you I am nothing
I am here for your convenience
You are the fiber of my very being
I must extract it carefully
What you’ve intricately weaved into the essence of who I am
I do not have problems for you to preoccupy yourself with
I don’t ask you to confront your moral ambiguities
I am silent, pleasing to the eye
And in return you give me praise,
The greatest drug
Will I ever be free

Performance

Process

This piece actually began pretty informally. I was feeling inspired and wrote a few lines in my Notes app and expanded the piece from there. I tried to think of the best ways to write and explain what I was feeling in hopes the reader would end up feeling that way too. It went through a few changes, but I’m very happy with the final product!